...I don't need it anymore...

Listening to: MeWithoutYou- Bullet to Binary I love This band. Andrew Jonathan Weis is a genius, and has the coolest voice ever. I need to get their album soon.

Wow. Need to sum up like, three days, here we go:

Friday:

AM: Hung out with Sarah from work, had some awesome God talks. Got "Love it to Death" by Alice Cooper. Cool tunage.

PM: Hung out with Sarah's sister Rachel and friend Jaqueline(SP?). Watched "The Day After Tomorrow" (Awful movie) and "Welcome to My Nightmare" by Alice Cooper (happy). Walked Rachel home. Lotsa fun. Went to bed at 5:30am...

Saturday:

AM: What Morning?!

PM: Bridge time. Lots of Fun. Feel more at home now. After hung out with Carlo, Caleb, Meaghan, and Bretterson. Some cool Burger King action.

Sunday:

AM: Service at WBC. Sarah came (Rocks!). Some funny mishaps during communion. Talks of what would happen if I dropped the communion glasses...Lets not see this in practice...!

PM: 8 hours at the Timmy Ho's.

Now: At home. 12:38. Typing. Sorry for incoherance. Tired. Go bed now

Bye.

Remember the Coop, huh?

Listening to: Alice Cooper- Be My Lover Gotta love Alice...

So...Went out with Jer for lunch and a SEVERE HAIRCUT yesterday. Got food poisoning from my BLT, was sick all night.

Despite being sick, went to work anyways. So...I'm at work and my supervisor's sister and friend come in and start talking to me...and to make a long story short I'm getting together with them tonight to watch Alice Cooper's "Welcome to My Nightmare" DVD. Sweet.

I'm diggin' the short hair man.

Until something profound happens, Keep rockin' it,

A place called Hell

Listening to: Bride- Mamma Everyone hated the album "Drop," but it's one of my favourites.

Worked all night. Slept all day. I'm comtemplating cuting my hair into a rock 'n' roll shag. I am aware that they are "trendy" right now...but they look cool. That, and three years of having hair halfway down my back makes it get annoying after a while.

Working nights sucks, because I inevitably slack off and don't read my bible/pray nearly as much as I need to. It totally screws up my patterns.

Anyway.

I'm gonna tear this movement down. I'm gonna remain deleted.

Listening to: Training for Utopia- Modus Operandi
The TFU "Best of" (if you can call it that) "Technical Difficulties" is essential. This music is insane.

Yeah. So. Just woke up after my midnight shift. Werkin' another today. (I think I'm becoming Nocturnal. What is this "sun" you talk about?)

So yeah, not much is happening besides the work thing. I'm currently reading two books on loan from coDE (http://bloodletting.blogspot.com) "Four Pillars of a Man's Heart" by Stu Weber (and if you're male and human you need to read this) and "Paul: Apostle of the Heart Set Free" by F.F. Bruce (which is just plain good).

I just got a letter from HM (www.hmmag.com) asking me to renew my subscription...hmmm...my subscription ran out like, 6 months ago...oh well.
Anyway, I'm gonna go read some books. Maybe eat some food. All that stuff.

We all live in fear of something

Listening to: Demon Hunter- Less Than Nothing Can't stop spinning the new DH record, "Summer of Darkness." Especially after reading Don and Ryan's bios at www.asterikstudio.com, and realizing how nice these guys really are.

Yeah. So I'm still digging the blog thing. I used to keep a journal and write in it like, 4 pages a day. Anyway. Listen to DH.

The Life and Crimes of...

Listening to:Transatlantic- Duel With the Devil
Can't beat 25 minute prog rock songs...especially ones with Mike Portnoy and Neal Morse playing on them...

So..Werked 6:30 to 10:00...and HAVE to werk 11:00-7:00. Boo. Ah, yes, I am a Timmy Ho's slave. (Need to get some sleep etc. later).

I need to write my letters to the Powerhouse kids today. It's been two weeks now...I need to do it before it becomes meaningless. (I am aware that the majority of people who read this will know what I mean...I don't think that anyone that doesn't know me will stumble upon this...then again...)

So that's life. Hmmm. I have the distinct feeling that volunteering at the Bridge will most certainly shape me and change me...more than I could ever imagine at the moment...God does everything for a reason, and I'm just starting to realize that even the people I know...serve a purpose in my life...and I serve a purpose in theirs...hopefully a positive edifying purpose, however I fear sometimes I'm the ass that they hate their whole lives...

Everything will be revealed in due time. Until then...

My Heart

Listening to: Nothing

Had an excellent talk with Carlo last night. It's so easy give into pointless temptations. It's so easy to hate sin with my brain and love it so dearly with my heart.

Certain things I have held onto long enough that they replaced God as the centre of my desires, the one that I worship. In essence my empty sins become my God and I am too left empty

I must be brutally honest here: I'm not very good at following God's instructions. At times I hate hearing the voice of his Spirit talk to me. At times I am ashamed to call myself a Christian, because applying that title to myself tarnishes Christ's name.

I wrote the following based on my honest observation of my own intentions:

Honesty appears to me a vice
I hold your hand and kiss your lips
You feed me everything that I desire
And I praise you
And I worship you my god

'Cause My heart doesn't hate you enough
to kick you down

All that I hold dear to me
All that my heart dwells upon
Not what they would think of me
Not what my brain permits
So I continue down this path
This well known decision
That I made years before
These events ever happened

And I hold you close
(I am bought at a price)
My four walled prison
(Honour God with my body)
I salivate at the thought
(There is not one that
I cannot stand up against)
I hold dear your empty yearning stare
(Hold fast to the wife of my youth)

'Cause to me you're nothing
Nothing but a sign
A graven image
A disguise
I desire to be true
But my heart is a whore
And I prostitute myself to you
My god

Because My heart doesn't hate you enough
To drag you down
Even though I Know there is nothing on which I cannot stand

Lord I pray I will stand against this.

A Reason

Listening to: Demon Hunter- The Latest and the Last

Begin
Break the Skin
Salvation quickly driven in
Pride in fracture
In Subjection

A New Supply
Running Red with purpose
Nothing less than Flawless in Design
Lyrics from "Bloodwork" by Living Sacrifice

This is a reason
A purging
The Hammering Process
Of Sanctification

Come along for the ride