Cracks

How can I sleep
When there's work to be done?
I long to be picked up in your arms.
You hold my face upon your breast
And sing me pretty songs.

In my dreams I stood before your thone,
But I was all alone!
Or was it a nightmare?
You said, "Son, where's your family?"
My eyes cast down,
Their blood's on my hands!
And my crown was empty.

When I awoke you were gone
And I wish you'd stay,
Oh, but I never even pray
When I'm awake,
Never mind when I'm sleeping.

I just wanna go home.
My sons, please come home!
All my fallen angels,
With thorns in your wings
Come home!
And this time,
I don't wanna be alone.

I see the army coming...

Oh, there's cracks in the wall,
Cracks in the wall of my city,
As it comes tumbling down.
There's cracks in the wall,
And I did not warn them,
Their blood's on my hands!

Forgive me!

Praying vs. Preying

When was the last time you prayed without asking for something?

It's hard isn't it. We're always like "Hey God, I need..., So-and-So needs... [rinse repeat] in Jesus' name, Amen." it's like we're preying instead of praying

I mean, of course we should ask for stuff, cause Jesus told us to, and cause Almighty God is willing to answer our prayers as long as our desires line up with his sovereign plan... and that's good. But so often all we do is ask for stuff.

Isn't God Holy?
Isn't God worthy of all our worship?

Worship is not just songs we sing at church. Worship is the way we live our lives. I challenge you to pray with the explicit purpose of praising God instead of asking for stuff.

And be naked when you pray. Not naked physically, but emotionally and spiritually. God knows everything in your head already... so say it like it is.

"Do not rejoice in this, that spirits are subject to you, but rejoice that your names are written in heaven" (Luke 10:20)

No matter who you are,
No matter what you do,
There's only one thing
I ask of you:
And that's if you pray,
Then when you pray,
Be naked prey.
Pray naked.-
"Pray Naked," by the 77s.

PS: The Everglow by Mae is one of the best pop albums ever... and I don't mean crappy pop, I mean good pop, like back when U2 was considered a pop band.

Deficient

Force it down. It's interesting;
The way they broke it down.
Reduplicate the lies.
But force it down.
Break it down.

A shining light is amplified,
and the truth will never drown.

It's interesting that our fathers
broke it down; break it down again.

One Year

On May 23, 2004 I began this blog. It is now the wee hours of May 22. One day to a year. I'd like to say that this year has been the most significant year of my life, or at least the most significant year since I became a Christian in 2001. Some good and bad things happened:

• Got a job at Tim Horton's... again...
• Left old church on bad circumstances that need not be delved into. Discovered my Spiritual Gift in the process. Only took four years... gosh!
• Met a charming girl named Sarah.
• Led said girl to a relationship with Jesus Christ.
• Became "emotionally entangled" with said girl. I mean, its pretty hard to explain.
• Volunteered at the Bridge for a year. Now I know their names.
• Discovered the wonderful world of theology and doctrine.
• Joined the congregation of Riverside Community Church
  
• Found out I'm not so ugly after all... two girls besides Sarah had crushes on me. I ended up dating one of them for a very brief period. (Bad move while "emotionally entangled" with someone else...)
• Became a bible study leader at TCF.
  
• Became infatuated with linguistics
• Lost all sense of direction in my life... I thought I would be a teacher... then a missionary... then a youth pastor... and now I'm considering bible translation. Man am I confused.
• Saw Alice Cooper, Underoath, The Chariot, Fear Before the March of Flames, and These Arms Are Snakes live in concert
• Bought too many cd's to list

All in all...I still need guidance, I still need the Spirit of God to direct me, and as I write this I feel my need to trust in God growing... I need to trust God for he will guide me.

I have finally realized what it means to be loved by a fellow human, and I have learned how to accept that love. Much thanks to Jerry and Sarah for putting up with me more than I deserve. The Bible says that "iron sharpens iron." You two are my iron and I want to be yours. I love both of you, two of the most important people in my life. Let us continue on in fellowship this year. And you two really need to get to know each other.

Thanks for reading my life for a year.
Here's to another.

PS: Sarah, being "emotionally entangled" with you is the best thing ever. Maybe I should just come out and say I love you. We'll figure all of this out, I know it.

There's a wolf in the piano

Listening to: Zao- Walk On By, Walk On Me (The Pianist's Prophecy) So I made a "new" Zao best of since I thought that the Legendary album was highly inadequate. I took off 6 songs and added 7 different ones. My version is so better.

So I covered a shift at the Bridge tonight only to find that there wasn't enough people to open anyway and then I came home.

I am now rocking the Zao and talking on MSN to Daniel who is a swell guy. I picked up a better shift tomorrow, I'm now working 7-3 baking. Yay. Anyway. I shall go rock now.

Okay, folks. Honestly....

One thing I hate more than any other thing is when people take bible verses out of context to try and prove their points... and in doing so they completely misinterpret the passage. Today I will rant about Romans 8: 26 and Jude 20.

Let me make this absolutely clear to everyone within shouting distance : THESE PASSAGES HAVE ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO WITH SPEAKING IN TONGUES!!!!!!!!!

The only books in the bible that mention the gift of tongues are Mark, Acts and 1 Corinthians. Do a word search!

Romans 8:26 says "In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express." (NIV)

Okay. First, its the Spirit interceding on our behalf. That doesn't involve us. It's the Spirit. He's not doing it "through" us (as he would be with tongues) but for us. Also, if this were tongues, that means that everyone who can't speak in tongues misses out on all of this. Yet Paul makes it clear that the Spirit is (present tense) interceding for all of us.

The Spirit is also praying in "groans that words cannot express." Well, that rules out tongues right there, considering that the gift of tongues is the ability to speak in understandable human languages that are not known to the speaker.

Jude 20 says "pray in the Holy Spirit" Hmm... the bible also says to walk in the Spirit. Does that mean we should walk in tongues? Now, I'm being sarcastic here, but praying in the Spirit simply means "pray in accordance with the Spirit." In other words, pray for things that are in God's will. That's a good way to avoid false doctrine (which is what Jude is about). The only way that anyone could possibly for a second think that this passage refers to tongues is if they were to read it with that presupposition.

Whenever the gift of tongues is mentioned, it states that "they spoke in tongues." It never says they "prayed in tongues," and the word "tongues" is always mentioned. If these passages were about tongues they would be the ONLY two exceptions to this.

So please, people. Don't just accept what someone says the bible says without looking into it yourself. Don't accept what I've written here without looking into it yourself. Be like the Bereans in Acts 17. Read it yourself. Read it in the context of the book it is in. Read it in reference to what the rest of the bible says. If you are unsure, check commentaries and essays by reputable scholars.

But for goodness sake, don't believe an interpretation of a text just because it is the current popular North American interpretation. That is a silly thing to do.

Also, I apologize for the theological nature of the past two posts. I do not intend this to be a place of essays. It is a journal. But sometimes I just need to rant about things. Especially things that really make me angry. It's just as therepeutic and not as damaging as banging my head against the wall ad infinitum. Thank you for your understanding.

Keep it real.

Really real.

As in, literally, not figuratively real.

For real.

Really, I mean this.

Love to Bolton.

(He keeps it real).

End post.

Spirit Baptism

This was a comment I posted on someone else's blog, but I felt that it is important enough to warrant posting on my own blog. This is a discussion of the doctrine of the Baptism of the Holy Spirit. Most of it I prepared for my Trent Christian Fellowship study on the Holy Spirit in January. This is a bit more in depth than I went in that study however. I also have notes prepared on Spirit Indwelling, Sealing, Filling, and all 18 of the Spiritual gifts. If anyone is interested in seeing those notes feel free to leave a comment and I'll post them in the future.

Spirit Baptism

Despite what Charismatics teach, every believer is baptized with the Holy Spirit, at the moment of salvation, and baptism of the Holy Spirit has absolutely nothing to do with speaking in tongues... or any of the other Spiritual gifts for that matter... at all.

This is quite easy to prove, because there are only 7 verses in the entire bible that have anything to do with Spirit Baptism.

Four of them are recordings of John the Baptist's prophecy concerning it (Matthew 3.11; Mark 1.8; Luke 3.16; and John 1.33).

One of which is Christ's promise of it (Acts 1.5)

One of which is the Apostle Peter's reflection on its occurrence (Acts 11.16).

That leaves only one verse regarding Spirit Baptism in any doctrinal sense. Let me make this abundantly clear: though it may be possible to debate some minor doctrines of scripture. It is impossible to debate the doctrine of the Baptism of the Holy Spirit. Since there is only one doctrinal verse concerning it, any varying position that contradicts what that verse says is incorrect and must be discarded.

Unfortunately most Charismatics have it in their heads that Spirit Baptism is some sort of “second blessing” with the Holy Spirit that is manifested by Speaking in tongues. This is in no way taught in scripture.

So, without further delay, here is the verse that contains the doctrine of Spirit Baptism:

“For in one Spirit we were all baptized into one body--Jews or Greeks, slaves or free--and all were made to drink of one Spirit.” (1 Corinthians 12.13; ESV)

The context of 1 Corinthians 12 deals with both the unity of the Body of Christ and the proper use of Spiritual gifts. (Paul addresses both issues to dismantle Spiritual pride.) Note what the Baptism of the Spirit accomplishes: believers are baptized into “one body,” regardless of social position. Also notice that, “all were made to drink of one Spirit.” Now, clearly this verse has absolutely nothing to do with speaking in tongues. It is also clear that Spirit Baptism is not something that happens subsequent to salvation, or that it is something that some believers have and some do not. ALL are baptized into one body. Why? So that “Jews, Greeks, slaves and Free” are united as one in Christ. The point of the verse is that we are all have positional equality in the body of Christ, and in the context of the chapter, that the more subtle gifts of the Spirit are equal to the more showy gifts. (As a side note: I find it interesting that Charismatics have invented this notion that Spiritual Baptism is related to tongues speaking when the only doctrinal verse regarding Spirit baptism is in the middle of a section in which Paul downplays the importance of tongues!)

So to sum up: Spirit Baptism is the doctrine that all are baptized into equality in the body of Christ at the moment of salvation. It has nothing to do with tongues or other Spiritual gifts, except to illustrate the equality of all gifts. To teach that it is a “second blessing” or happens subsequent to salvation has no textual basis in scripture and is false doctrine. It also convolutes and undermines the fact that Spirit baptism is given specifically to unify the church.

Behold: "It is good!"

Listening to: Sal Paradise- Lost Maps I got this album for free when a guy at my old church gave away a bunch of cds. I don't know much about the band, except that they're from Australia and have released 4 albums and one ep. This was one of two that were available in North America. They play low-fi indie rock in the vein of Pedro the Lion and Sebadoh. Decent stuff.

Today I did not work. Sarah invited me out for supper. We went to Eastside Mario's. I've always been a fan of EM's, but tonight it was at least 10 times better than normal... it was hotter, the portions were bigger, and our server was very nice to us. Plus I didn't have to pay. Sarah insists on paying every once and a while. That's cool. We also took some salad, bread, and cake to Cheryl and Carol.

After eating we went went to Fabric Land so Sarah could buy some fabric for the dress she'll be wearing to Josh and Tonya's wedding. She is going to look beautiful. (But that's a given).

Here's a poem I wrote today while loitering in the mall:

From man's flesh torn,
Your soft and supple curves.
This woman; the brightest
Of God's creations,
And behold: "It is good!"

Beneath the navy blue sky
Your eyes glow like bright flames.
I gaze upon the most beautiful
Of God's creations,
And behold: "It is good!"

I need to go do some homework. Sick, I know.

Disorganized Beyond Recognition

A lot of really cool things have been happening, and I really don't know where to start without really going off. I'll try to be brief.

The other day I had to confess a sin to a fellow believer in Christ (as the bible instructs). It was not something I wanted to do... nor something I enjoyed doing. In fact it was never my intention to even do it. You see, the sin I had committed directly influenced the person that I confessed to, but the person would not have really known that it did. But it was the type of sin that kills friendship and honesty. (But isn't that all of them?) As I said... I did not want to confess it, but as I began talking to this person I felt God's Spirit tell me that if I didn't confesss my sin, it would ruin everything that I had developed in my friendship with this person. So I told the person what I did. The look on their face was one of complete painful dissappointment, but also complete forgiveness. I felt as though I was staring into the eyes of Christ himself at that moment. I felt more guilty than I've felt in a long time... but I also knew the peace of God. I can accept forgiveness now. From both God and the person I sinned against.

At the Bridge I drew a mixed media "abstract" picture in my journal with one of the Bridge kids. It was liberating. Art is beautiful, even though I suck at it.

For the Junior Highs today, I led a study on 2 Corinthians 5:16-21. I also read a passage from Kevin Max's book Unfinished Work and played his song Be from the Stereotype Be album. The main idea was that we are all unique and are capable of preaching and witnessing in ways that no other person is capable of.

I have recently been overwhelmed by the fact that every single person is a unique individual created by God... there is only one of them... and there will only ever be one of them. We are all God's beautiful creations, who have value and purpose given to us by him. Life without knowing God is a sorry existence.

I know what it's like to be loved by God and people. That is a beautiful thing.

Maternal parental unit day.

Today is mother's day. I made my mom a book of my poetry (much of which can be found in the archives of this here blog).

I wish purity spread like a disease as easily as sin. Have you ever wanted something more than anything you've ever wanted... but known that it would be bad timing and wrong to have it? Ever try to get it anyway?

Keep walking, beathing...

Tomorrow I work at 4 am. Sucks to my ass-mar.

Great. See you later.

Truly a beautiful mess...

Listening to: Joy Electric- The Good Will Not Be Cloned or Why Should the Christians Have All the Bad Music Gotta love that title. I bet it won Ronnie Martin some fans in Youth group leaders...

So Sarah was feeling better so we had some Taco Bell and had communion together. It was interesting leading communion. We read from 1 Corinthians. It was cool.

We had a little mishap at Taco Bell. I must work on having better temperment.

I helped Sarah make a blog. I linked to it at the side, but for the lazy, here you go.

You, feed the bloated bleed the shorted.

Listening to: Joy Electric- Sing Once For Me Picked up the record Legacy Volume 1: The White Songbook at Bluestreak today...

...I'm glad I found it, since I have wanted this album since the year it was released. I have the song "A New Pirate Tradtional" on a comp, and I really wanted to pick up the record on the strength of that track, even though its techno and I'm clearly not a techno fan.

Anyway, I finally have the album, and now that I actually have read the lyrics to "A New Pirate Traditional" I must say I like it even better now. The song is about the hypocritical Christian music industry. Ronnie Martin was fed up with being ignored after ten years of recording albums, and it shows on this song (and the rest of the album). I'm going to print the lyrics here, as they also wonderfully sum up my own grievances with the Christian music industry.

A New Pirate Traditional

Keep lying to appear complete,
You're so not there.
Reap more unjust rewards,
Who really cares?

Sick and tired of being denied
A rightful place along your side.
But who will love us?
And will an ounce ever be mine?

You, feed the bloated
Bleed the shorted.

Content to see me sink
Into obscurity.
Ten years of pleading
You're not listening.

Sick and tired of being deprived
While all the newcomers claim the prize.
But who will love us?
And will the crown ever be mine?

You, feed the bloated
Bleed the shorted.

Who will love us,
The unloved who will love us,
The unloved.

Who will love us?
And will an ounce ever be mine?

(Lyrics by Ronnie Martin)

Sarah was sick today and could not go to church, and since everyone except me and Tonya was working today the "Young Adults" meeting was cacelled until two weeks from now.

Tomorrow; I have off. Jerry and I; shall do stuff.

The girl did not come last night, but that is okay. We were super busy last night and only four (4) volunteers showed up. Fortunately, nothing crazy happened.

So there's this box full of like, three years worth of Christianity Today magazines under the table in the staff room at the Bridge. Sweet! Reading materials! Although I'm not a super huge fan of Christianity Today it will give me something to read. (In one issue there was an ad for a "Pastor's Conference" that involved a special day of golf... Golf?! Shouldn't Pastors be doing something, um, a little more important than golfing at a conference?!?! Gah!)

Anyway. I'm out.

Leave some comments. I'm getting lonely.